How do I communicate with my husband so that he hears?

 

    In what language to speak to him, so that the words do not fly away from him like peas off the wall, but really "digest" it?

Here are seven rules of dialogue with a man, a husband:

1. Men do not know (and do not want) to think "in broad strokes.

Try to choose one topic for conversation. If you will try to grasp the immensity, and "cram" in a list of problems with everything from not carrying the trash to his friends, who have bad influence on him, it is unlikely he will listen to you at all.

Identify the problem, discuss it. Leave other grievances for later, there is no need to pile on.

2. Don't rush him.

If he's not talking, that doesn't mean you should rush him. Men like to think about an answer before they say it. He is trying for your own good, choosing words so as not to offend you.

Give him time to formulate a response, hold this quiet pause. It is necessary so that the dialogue doesn't turn into conflict.

3. Logic, brevity and concreteness.

Here are three basic parameters for dialogue with a man. The clearer and shorter thoughts - the better.

Men do not like ornate sentences, intricate phrases "with subtext", hints, half hints, riddles, puzzles, and other nonsense, for which women want to disguise the real problem.

Like, I want him to guess himself, so I'm not going to tell him that it is necessary to screw in a second light bulb. But just buy a light bulb and put it in a prominent place, and he will hint, saying, if it's not dark to you? Men do not understand why these "performances"? If he was dark, he would have screwed in a light bulb a long time ago.

Is it dark for you? Tell me.

I'm sure your man's not a dog, he won't bite you. Why are you so afraid of him, that you go around and around?

4. Keep your emotions in check.

He also wants to scream, for sure. But he gritted his teeth and kept quiet. Remember, the tone of the dialogue, most often, sets a woman. The calmer you are, the calmer he is.

5. Emphasize important thoughts.

Men do not hear women because the sound of their voice is associated with music. This is just a theory, not scientifically proven, but it exists. Remember about it, and try to emphasize the important moments for you!

6. Don't criticize, but talk about your emotions.

Don't demand, but ask in a compliment format. When a man feels that she is the head of the family, that he is respected, that he means - he feels good. He will respond with kindness.

Not for nothing they say that a man - the head, and a woman - the neck. Spin it wisely!